Unwelcome in Mexico

Last week, unforunately was another hard week. I went to the Mexican government office, feeling very nervous, but hopeful that this Visa process wouldn't be as horrible as they say it is. However, immediately upon entering I knew this guy meant business and that it was NOT going to be easy. Apparently rules have changed and I was not informed of needing my letter from Loyola University Ministry to be Notarized with a Certificate of Authenticity. WHAT?! Where this came from I have no idea. None of the other missionaries had to do this. Not only is this necessary, but I have 3 weeks to do it, or its Adios to Mexico. Ok so not forever, but If I do not get this done by February 23rd I must leave Mexico and return again. And let me tell you, I did not save up to leave the country every six months and stay on a Tourist Visa... So, as being my second time not getting my visa for uncontrollable reasons, I am seriously frustrated. This process has left me feeling pretty helpless and misguided. And feeling like, maybe its just not meant to be for me to be here in Mexico, since this never seems to work out. And the sad thing is, I want to be here. I don't want to leave. I am finding my place, slow but surely. Learning patience in all aspects and attempting to find new roles here.

Ok, so I must admit this Visa thing is not the end of the world. But I feel very worried and nervous regardless. I can not do anything in Mexico and must leave my fate in the hands of others... I am trying, impatiently, to wait for these items. And asking favors of many around me in order to get the letter in Chicago sent ASAP. I feel very guilty having to ask this again of the same person... But I guess there is nothing I can do. But wait. And hope. And pray.

I couldn't be more grateful for the help that I am recieving from friends and family in the U.S. And even a couple here in Mexico. I know this will all work out in the end, but I wish that it could have gone differently.

I am trying to let my frustration go. Because I still have work to do here. I still have to find a bigger role here. A role that is mine. Not just in the Guarderia. But in the community. I am finding my Spanish is getting better everyday and I am beginning to find conversation easier and less nerve racking. Now is time for grabbing on to my faith and trusting that what is meant to happen will happen...